I’m the raving queen of gratitude.
So… you know by now how important I think gratitude is.
But you know what is maybe even more powerful? The simple “Thank you.”
It is the embodiment of gratefulness. And when you use it… BOOM! You not only give yourself a self-worth boost, you give it to someone else at the same time!
It doesn’t matter if it’s a stranger or the love of your life – spontaneous acts of thanks matter. Even if you don’t know the person from Ozzy Osborne, that act of gratitude, no matter how small, will give you both a personal high and a boost of self-worth.
Can this even be legal??
And it’s free.
So how do you get such a confidence boost when you lay down this superpower? I’m going to show you…
Because we know creating gratitude creates self-worth. And what is thankfulness? Gratitude!
It says, “I value you.” Not only that, it recognizes that you are the kind of person someone was willing to do something for, some act of kindness. How can that not boost your self-worth?
You are taking a moment to express gratitude for someone who valued you enough to do something good for.
2. Social Connection
Thanking someone creates social connection simply by saying THANK YOU!
It builds the emotional bond in a way that seeps through to the heart of a person.
We’re social creatures. So guess what? You end up feeling happy and connected! How awesome is that?
You thank someone else, and you end up getting the benefit through the feeling of connecting to another human being. And as a bonus, so do they.
3. Your Perception Changes
That’s right. It does.
You actually begin to see things differently as your neurons start re-wiring around that new way of interacting with the world. The more you do it, the stronger it becomes, the more you notice things to be thankful for or to appreciate others for.
Ever notice how you maybe have your eye on a certain new car or gadget, and all of sudden you see it EVERYWHERE?
Same thing happening there.
The more you look for things to be thankful for, the more you’ll notice it, and the more you’ll have to be thankful for.
It’s like magic. The more you choose to be thankful, the more thankful things appear in your life. As you engage and cultivate thankfulness in your daily life, the glasses you wear start to change. They see more clearly the good things.
All the little acts of kindness get sharper. All the positive moments get brighter. And you see less and less of the smudges and grime that were fogging up your lenses!
Perception is a funny thing.
4. Compassion and Responsibility
Being thankful creates space for compassion. That means not only compassion for others, but for yourself.
Yup, you heard me right – “Compassion for yourself.”
But isn’t everyone suppose to be in love with themselves?
In a way. But too often, we can be meaner and more critical of ourselves than we even are of others. Compassion for ourselves releases that self-criticism and lets us take responsibility for our lives. We start to be able to look at the negatives that happen as lessons learned.
Compassion for ourselves means we can start to accept who we are, when we stumble, and be able to see clearly enough to learn from our struggles. That is a powerful source of transformation and growth.
5. Become Better Parents, Spouses, Children
We all want to be better for those we love and are closest to. Use thanks as a tool to cultivate self-awareness and connection with your children, with your spouse, with your parents, whoever you have that life bond with.
There are always struggles and rough patches in relationships that close to you, and which we often never really have a choice with. And when it comes to our children, we know we don’t always get the appreciation we deserve.
But you can choose how you approach those relationships. And just because they don’t say it doesn’t mean they don’t feel it.
You can choose to nurture appreciation and thanks between you.
You can shift the perception through action.
Give thanks for little things, for positive changes, for moments where they appreciated you – appreciation goes a long way to creating stronger, more positive relationships that in turn boost our confidence, self-worth, and feeling of support. Good relationships are the ultimate mental boost! Protect them. Improve them.
Make the small wins a BIG DEAL!
They take out the trash, they don’t talk back, they say a kind word, they show courage… anything can be worthy of praise, and should be.
Putting it All Together
So there you have it. Now it’s time to put it into action!
The biggest confidence booster is action, and when that action is thankfulness you get a double whammy. So here’s how to do it…
Thank them for a specific action they have done, no matter how big or how tiny.
For example – “Thank you for writing me that note that made me feel loved and cared for.” The person who wrote you the letter will then get a good feeling from writing it. Then it will domino positive responses or illicit more for more. This action alone will keep both of you coming back for more.
Same goes for children… “Honey I am proud of the way you handled the game. Even though you lost by one point I noticed you working hard, I noticed that you held you head up and are respectful to the other team, players, refs and your coach. Honey that show integrity and Thank you for showing me that example.”
BAM! How does that sound?
Start with one spontaneous act of thanks today…
Write a letter. Say it in person. Even a text or Facebook message can be enough.
I want you to think of someone right now to thank. I don’t care how you do it, just do it. Thank them, appreciate them, and keep it up!
You’ll be feeling better about yourself, creating resiliency, and building better connections before you know it!
It’s like a daily shot of self-worth.
Comment below who you are going to thank and why. And bonus points to those who come back and also say how it went!