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Change Your Story, Change Your Life


So many times in my life I chose to listen to the lie in my head.

I listened to the belief system of someone else’s story. Not mine. Not the one I chose

When we’re children, we’re learning, so it’s fine. We soak up all those messages like a sponge. Your 3rd grade teacher’s work ethic rings in your ears. Your aunt’s vitality to live with passion beats in your own heart like a drum.

But there may also be that voice that says you’re never good enough. Or there’s the belief you can hear after so many years that came from Uncle Gerald about how life is all struggle, and you never get a break.

I understand. It is much easier to allow the lie to control your action and behaviors than to create your own.

When we were young we needed to learn and get guidance. But we didn’t know how to choose. And now we carry those messages with us, both good and bad.

We may not even know the hidden beliefs in our head that control our lives with someone else’s story. The negative lie has done its job – it has stopped you from taking action.

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Time to change it.

There have been so many times in my life I didn’t act. Each time I created another missed opportunity. I was so afraid of rejection. I was afraid of the “what if.”

I had lied to myself about my self-worth. This showed up in the types of jobs I took or didn’t take, modeling opportunities I passed up, traveling opportunities that passed on by…

And then there was the “man” I allowed in my life because of the lie I told myself unconsciously. The lie didn’t let me hear the voice that said, “Do not date this guy. He is going to shatter your self-esteem more than it already is because all you are doing is giving your power away.”

I had no idea who I was or who I wanted to be. I wasn’t even “aware” I was giving away my power to a man who could crush me with it.

Every time you believe the lie that doesn’t serve YOU, you are continuing to lie to your soul (your inner love of self). And you are missing out on the messages that do serve to create an amazing life.

Change began when I chose to take responsibility and change my story.

I chose to take responsibility for my mindset, for my actions, for the people I let in my life, and my belief systems. When I revised my beliefs and my story, that is when empowerment began.

I won’t lie – the change is hard work. The choosing is the easy part. The action is the harder one.

The lie will try to tell you are not good enough, powerful enough, lucky enough. Keep forging ahead through this fear. Don’t stop. 

If you do not, you are telling your soul, your inner love, the most devastating lie you can tell. This is a lie to your soul. You are giving up on YOU!

I am not going to sugar coat the work. The emotional “pealing of the onion” is not an easy task. It is uncomfortable. It is scary. It is sometimes downright unbelievable. Denial is a tough nut to crack!

And you know what else? The lie is easier. Your mind thinks, “I would much rather not think about ___________(you fill in the blank).”

But here’s a new story to grab a hold of – good things are worth the effort. And having an amazing life filled with amazing people is definitely a good thing. Getting unstuck and out from under a pile of emotional burden that buries you is a good thing. Getting your dream job, the love of your life, the trip of your life, accomplishing something incredible – these are all very good things.

But you can’t do them when the lies of someone else’s story keeps you pinned down right where you are. Nope, you just get delivered more and more of the same by the dump truck of life. Time to change the order you’re sending out…

Have you ever done a free trial only to find yourself with a subscription to something you don’t want? Sometimes they won’t even let you go. You hunt down how to cancel, jump through hoops, or fight with someone over the phone, until it’s finally gone.

If you want to have something different in your life, you have to change it. Cancel the order and subscribe to something that serves you.

Cancel what you don’t want in your life anymore. Subscribe to what you do. The concept is that simple. Take the action.

Action is the #1 thing you can do to create a new story with new messages to define the rest of your life.

Your mindset is created from the experience of action, and your life follows your mindset. When you take action even through your fear, you subscribe to a new message, and the message will transform your life.

The fear is a sign it’s working, that you making a real change. Fear shows up as:

  • Fear of the unknown
  • Fear of making an ass out of yourself
  • Fear of taking the wrong step
  • Fear of missing out on something else
  • Fear of success
  • Fear of taking a stand
  • Fear of judgments
  • Fear of responsibility
  • Fear of not doing a good job
  • Fear of failure (which is a bit of an oxymoron, because you need to take action to fail or succeed. And even in failure there is wisdom!)

The lie is afraid of change. But you are tired of where you are and where you’ve been.

It is all in your ACTION that you craft your future. You gain wisdom regardless of if you fail or succeed. And with wisdom, you gain confidence and create new beliefs and messages.

Every small success changes your story and builds your confidence. Every misstep teaches you what not to do next time, making it easier to succeed.

The more you act, the more change happens. Every act is a choice, and choice is taking control of your story. You are creating new messages about who you are and what you believe.

The more you take actions to keep your boundaries, say “No”, to choose possibility, to march into your boss’s office and ask for your worth, to take a chance with a new opportunity that scares you – the more you take the easier it becomes. The more confident you become. The more you shift your story of who you are and where your life will go.

With every action you seed the power to grow something mighty:

  • Someone who is paid what she’s worth
  • Someone who attracts the right people into her life
  • Someone who gets the love and respect she deserves
  • Someone who lives fully every moment of her life

What to do NOW… Work with Sue

Are you living the lies of someone else’s story?

It’s time to change that.

(In sharing you are leading by example and sharing your vulnerability to inspire others.)

Next, choose one small action you can take to send the lie “return to sender” and create your own story. I want to hear your actions, so share it in the comments below!

Even if there is no immediate result (and many times there may not be) please do not allow your fear of judgment get in the way of inspiring others. By simply taking the action you are setting an example and you are gaining self-confidence and wisdom.

With love and blessings, Sue